These energy waves have been super intense, everything feels like it has sped up since the Solstice in June. We are shifting rapidly, and my experience has been simultaneously amazing and brutal. For me, the brutal part has been the reckoning of my physical body. I seem to handle the emotional waters quite well, digging deep into my psyche. Yet often with the physical, I feel as if I’m hitting a wall.
From the time I was born with a diseased kidney that led to its removal at age 10, it has been one illness, injury, or surgery after another. I have overcome tremendous challenges, and often my spirit’s vitality overshadows the body’s struggle. One of my greatest struggles was a spinal injury that left me severely limited and with chronic nerve pain.
Just 12 short years ago they told my husband that they were grateful that I was able to wiggle my toes, but my quality of life would be greatly diminished due to pain. I have done incredible amounts of work to heal the body and the blockages that have kept me from healing. I hike mountains now.
Yet recently I was knocked down as I stepped wrong on a rock while on the trail, and I fully broke a sesamoid bone in my left foot. This injury began in October of 2021, and I nursed it back to health and was able to hit the trail again, only for it to break fully this time.
Oddly enough, I broke the same bone in my right foot in 2019, and finally had it surgically removed in 2021. What I’ve noticed is that since the removal of that bone, the energy flows much more freely through my right side. This has helped me to heal on an even greater level. While intellectually I know all this, it’s little consolation for the fact that I am headed to surgery again in 2 weeks.
The amount of frustration, anger and even betrayal I felt was shocking. Being on the trail first thing in the morning was my happy place. It grounded me and brought in a huge amount of clarity. The biggest thing was that my mind/body/spirit felt whole. There was a synergy that was created. I could feel myself being more present and connected, more here than I ever have been.
To have this taken away felt like a huge sucker punch from the universe. I went into “What have I done wrong?” That feeling was compounded when it was suggested that I maybe I wasn’t listening to my body, that I had pushed too hard. I just wanted to scream.
There is so much guilt and shame that can come in, especially from the spiritual community when one is injured or sick. It’s often an unconscious way of creating a hierarchy. Some that are doing well through these energy waves, can often be pulled into the ego state of “I must be doing something right because I am doing great, therefore they must be doing something wrong.” It’s full of judgment that creates tremendous disharmony in the community.
I knew deep within that this break from the activity wasn’t about me needing to “Be Still.” I had developed a routine of exercising the body first thing in the morning, and then spending the next couple of hours connecting within, writing, learning, and sometimes just simply staring at the wall.
I felt so betrayed. I listen to guidance, I listen to the body, and I have been doing all the “right” things to support all of my being. So why did this happen?
Simultaneously, information and dreams are coming in about work needing to be done in Belize. While exciting, it also added to the frustration of “Okay Spirit, I will follow my path, but can you please keep my body from breaking?”
The other day, I was doing something and shifted my weight incorrectly, and pain seared through my foot, even while wearing a boot. All of a sudden it erupted from my mouth “I hate this! I hate this weak body! I hate this limitation!” I sat back in shock at my outburst, and I could feel within a crumbling. I knew I needed to get quiet and work through this.
I went outside and wrote out my frustration; all of it, the bad and the ugly. I sat with it, and I then let my body speak. The amount of sorrow and frustration the body felt was tremendous. My body began to list off all of the challenges it has healed, all the ways that I, too, had mistreated it in this lifetime, and even what I’m asking of it to hold and anchor in more and more light and codes.
My body wasn’t wrong, and I apologized for feeling so angry and betrayed. The body, too, was feeling this, but I was the one that betrayed it by not honoring its service. I dried my tears and asked my Spirit “What now?” and heard “Go to the Akash, you need to understand more.”
I settled myself and began to journey. I entered the Akashic Record and was met with one attendant, but a member of my spirit team came forward saying that she would assist me. We pulled my record and I told her that I needed to understand why I have had such a difficult journey physically. I have been working diligently to heal myself, yet new things come up.
She told me that she understood my frustration, and asked me if I understood my role in this life. I told her that I believe so, that my role is to help others through their journey to self and to anchor in light and codes on the earth. She said, “Yes, but you are also an example of what is possible when one heals within.” I asked her “Does this mean I have to keep creating things to overcome to be that example?” She said, “No, you are not creating these things, you are clearing them.”
“We have shared some of this with you before, but we want to expound on the information previously given.
As you know, a large grouping came into the planet at this time to assist with the Ascension process. We have even referred to this group to you as a pinch hitter (A pinch hitter is a baseball term where a special player is brought in that bats in place of a teammate, typically at a critical point in the game).
The fundamental role of a pinch hitter, in this case, is to clear the ancestral DNA and recode/return the divine blueprint to its original form. This assists the lineage with moving off the wheel of karma. Each pinch hitter was strategically placed in families that had tremendous karma and trauma.
The clearing of karma is done on all planes of reality. This is not an easy task by any means. Instead of judging your physical issues as an indicator that you have done something wrong, see it as you are moving through and clearing another layer.”
I asked “Aren’t physical issues the sign of stuck energy or resistance?”
“Yes, yet many are clearing the stuck energies of one’s lineage rather than their own failings. It is the incorrect judgment or fault finding in oneself or another that creates the greatest resistance that allows the blockage to linger. Acceptance of one’s role as a lineage clearer and the reframing of how events are received is essential for greater ease.
We understand that it can feel like a never-ending task and a burden. Yet this is precisely what pinch hitters’ souls have come to do. They have come to clear with finality what has held so many back for eons. In the overall space and time, the service is exactly just a moment at bat. We do understand, however, that this moment can span a lifetime and have incredible gratitude for the work being done.”
I said ” I understand. Does this mean that I will have continual physical problems of varying kinds?”
“You will have additional blockages to clear, yes. Although realizing that each one is a substantial clearing for your lineage may bring comfort. If you look at the progression of your injuries and illnesses, they are not nearly as difficult as they once were. You are not meant to suffer through this incarnation, you are simply meant to clear the density of the lineage, and you can achieve this at a much faster pace now more than ever.
You do receive extraordinary assistance from your earthly team (spouse, children, healing practitioners) and your spirit team. While we cannot keep you from these events, we can assist you through them.”
I expressed my gratitude for all that she explained, and then returned to my body. I had a conversation with her, apologizing again and explaining all that I had come to understand and promised her that I wouldn’t blame her anymore.
We are truly the interface between spirit and our body. As I said these words, it felt as if this understanding brought tremendous ease, a sigh of relief. We (My body and I) signed up for this, and we are completely qualified to not only clear the lineage but to do the work that we’re meant to do on this earth.
I share all of this because so many of you are also “pinch hitters,” clearing the lineage and anchoring the light. So many of you often feel ashamed, guilty, or less than due to the difficulties of this incarnation. So many of you, like me, have been working on all the layers, digging in deep, but are finding challenges still arise. It can be overwhelming and exhausting.
All of this is exacerbated when many have aspects of self that don’t fully want to be in the body or within this matrix. Physicality is hard, and may not be one’s original essence. Tapping into this aspect and working with it will help to ease resistance to the next thing clearing, whether it’s physical, emotional, or mental.
I was talking to a friend recently, Aubrielle Benton. She, too, had been experiencing something similar. While hers hasn’t been physical, it was the similar feeling of “What have I done wrong? Why am I being punished?”
As she sat with it, she realized that it’s a type of programming, one she is calling Luciferian programming. It is equivalent to being cast out of heaven and thrown into hell. It creates the illusion of if one is good, only good things happen. If one is bad, one must experience hell or suffering. Yet we know at our core that this is not true, yet the programming is often there.
This belief/programming combined with the task many of us have agreed to is quite combustible. It can create incredible resistance, frustration, and anger in the form. It’s our job to root out that programming, and we do this through full acceptance of what is.
I was talking about all of this with one of my daughters, and she looked at me and said ” Mom, by the time you’re 60, you’ll be so healthy that you’ll be running circles around dad.” As she said these words I was covered in goosebumps, and I saw the truth in her eyes. We are not meant to suffer. We’re here to assist our lineage, clear the ancestral DNA, and build a new way of being. Though the road can be difficult, we are doing just that.
Take care of yourself, and honor your experiences and your role. My deepest gratitude to everyone that is assisting at this incredible time.
Lots of love to you.